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SamZee
Whoosh.

Samsatus @SamZee

In my head.

Joined on 12/15/11

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Comments

breathe*. Also, using the word 'light' twice so soon after each other looks kinda ugly. Maybe you could make something like:

'At first he couldn't see a thing. From the dark and eerie environment under the trees, his new environment (or something like that) was a big change, too much for his eyes to cope. Slowly they got used to the ocean of light (nice one, by the way) and started to distinguish things. He now saw why this enormous source of light didn't bother him when he was walking to it, for the creature [...]'

Otherwise, reads well. Love the pic too.

Owyeah, I really try to filter those situations out, but it indeed still happens that I repeat certain words so shortly after each other. I'll fix that and keep it in mind ^^.
But I'm glad you like it! I actually noticed myself using more uhm, what's it in english?, describing, associations, that kinda stuff ("beeldspraak" in dutch?). I don't know if you noticed, but I did and I quite liked it, although I also hope it didn't got tootoo much of it.